Unplanned pregnancy is never easy

Does it seem like friends, family and even complete strangers bombard you with information and opinions when you have an unplanned pregnancy? They forget that it’s YOUR decision and that YOU have to live with the consequences. You might feel uncertain about how to deal with your situation – and you also know that depending on what you choose to do, it has the potential to change the trajectory of your life and that of your child.

You have choices with an unplanned pregnancy

It’s natural to feel a connection to your developing baby, even before it is born. It’s also very common to feel bewildered, uncertain and disconnected when you’re pregnant but don’t want to be. Both states of mind are perfectly normal with an unplanned pregnancy. You may also feel overwhelmed by the situation you find yourself in, but it’s important to weigh your choices and think clearly and rationally about what to do next.

For many women, an unplanned pregnancy comes down to just two choices: Keep and raise the child, or place the baby into another family through adoption. When pregnancy is unexpected, both of these options can be good choices and provide a positive outcome for you and your baby.

Placing the baby’s best interests first, it’s important to consider several questions.

• Can you provide a safe, stable home for the child?
• Are you financially capable of providing everything needed to take care of a growing child?
• Will you be able to afford childcare, if you need to work to provide for your child?
• Do you have a supportive partner or family members who will help with childcare and financial support?
• Are you ready for the demands that a baby will place upon your time and freedom?
• Are you prepared for the permanent life changes that come with motherhood?
• Will you still be able to pursue your educational, personal or career goals while raising a baby?

The truth is, choosing between raising your child and adoption is not an easy decision. Both are choices that will have life-changing consequences, both for you and for your child. An unplanned pregnancy is an emotional time for many women, so it’s important to take your time and think through your options thoroughly.

If you choose to place your baby for adoption, it is normal to feel sadness mixed with relief. It may help to talk your decision through with a counselor, clergy member or someone else you trust. In the end, remember that you are empowered to make choices about the family in which your baby is raised and how involved in the child’s life you would like to be. Knowing this can provide immense peace of mind for women with unplanned pregnancy who are not ready to be mothers, but who want their child to have the best possible life.

If you don’t want to raise a child, or feel that you are not ready, it may comfort you to know that there are many loving families hoping and waiting for a chance to adopt your child. You may be surprised to learn about all the options that are now available if you choose adoption. If you would like more information before you make this big decision, contact the licensed social workers at Legacy Adoption Services.