Legacy can help after you learn your son’s girlfriend is pregnant

When your son’s girlfriend is pregnant, it can bring a rush of emotions. How could this happen?  What should you do or say next? Our Texas adoption agency has counseled many grandparents in the same position. We know that an unplanned pregnancy has ripple effects on the entire family. Below are some of the common topics we discuss with the expectant families we work with.

Unplanned pregnancy is common in the United States

Many parents experience shock when they learn that their son’s girlfriend is pregnant. This is especially true if the couple is young. However, unplanned pregnancy among teenagers is common in the United States and in Texas. In fact, Texas has one of the highest teenage birth rates in the country.

Due to the high volume of unplanned pregnancies in Texas, there is an abundance of resources out there to help. You can turn to the Texas Department of Health and Human Services to learn about resources. Our Texas adoption agency also offers unbiased counseling and support for expectant parents and their families.

How to provide support when your son’s girlfriend is pregnant

Your son and his girlfriend need empathy and support from you. This may be difficult if you’re experiencing a rush of anger or sadness. But remember that placing blame won’t help the situation. The most effective response you can offer now is one of love and support. Start by speaking to your son and his girlfriend.

• “I know you must feel a sense of loss and confusion. We will be here for you.”
• “You don’t need to worry about us being angry. We love you no matter what.”
• “More people will have compassion than judgment for you, including us.”

After finding out that your son’s girlfriend is pregnant, it may be helpful to reach out to her parents in some circumstances. By extending grace first, you can set the tone for the family dynamic going forward.

Working with our adoption agency

Our Texas adoption agency helps the entire family of expectant parents. If your son and his girlfriend decide that adoption is the best choice for their child’s future, you will most likely go through a grieving process. This is normal.

However, modern adoption is very different than the closed adoptions of the past. You can take comfort knowing that modern adoption often allows the birth family to receive updates from the adoptive family as the child grows. Researchers have found that this more-open arrangement is healthy and rewarding for everyone, including the birth family, adoptive family and adoptee.

Contact our office at (817) 784-7641 to speak with an adoption counselor today.