Legacy can help after you learn your son’s girlfriend is pregnant

When your son’s girlfriend is pregnant, it can bring a rush of emotions. As parents, we want our children to enjoy their youth and go on to do wonderful things with their lives. You may fear that an unexpected pregnancy would derail your son’s life, and you worry for his girlfriend, too. Take a moment to breathe and consider how best to help your son through this challenging time. One thing you can do is provide unconditional love and support as you help him get the facts about adoption as well as parenting.

Because an unplanned pregnancy affects the entire family, our Texas adoption agency is here to help. We have counseled many grandparents-to-be in the same position.

Unplanned pregnancy is common in the United States

It may come as a shock when you learn that your son’s girlfriend is pregnant, especially if the couple are young or in their teens. It may help to understand that unplanned pregnancy in teenagers is common in the United States and in Texas. In fact, Texas has one of the highest teenage birth rates in the country, and the rates of teenage pregnancy here are on the rise.

Your son is certainly not alone, and there are people who can help. Our Texas adoption agency offers unbiased counseling and support for young parents and their families.

How to provide support when your son’s girlfriend is pregnant

First and foremost, your son and his girlfriend need empathy and support from you. It’s natural to feel upset with your son, or sad about the situation. It may be hard to keep those emotions to yourself, but expressing disappointment, anger or blame just makes the situation more complicated and might drive your son away.

Even if you weren’t expecting to be a grandparent, it’s natural to feel protective about both your son and his unborn baby. If your son and his girlfriend choose parenting, you may worry for the whole family’s future. If they decide that adoption is the best path for them and their child, you may feel a mix of emotions from relief to grief. Your son will likely experience the same feelings you are, so be open, honest and supportive, whatever they decide.

The best thing you can do is listen to your son and try to understand his feelings and worries. Provide unconditional love and support for both your son and his pregnant girlfriend. Reassure them that the decisions are theirs, but you will be there to help them, and that you love them no matter what.

Do not talk to others about the pregnancy, as it is not your news to share. You want to keep your son’s trust and keep the lines of communication open.

After finding out that your son’s girlfriend is pregnant, it may also be helpful to reach out to offer support to her parents, but only with permission from her and your son. By extending grace first, you can set the tone for the family dynamic going forward.

What to expect from our Texas adoption agency

With an unplanned pregnancy, many young people are uncertain about what to do next. Before making any decisions, it is wise to learn about all of the options, including both parenting and placing the baby for adoption.

Our Texas adoption agency has experienced, caring counselors who provide objective facts about adoption as well as the realities of parenting. We will never pressure anyone to choose one option over another. Our goal is simply to support the entire family as they move through an emotional, often challenging time together.

It may give you peace of mind to learn that modern adoption is very different than the closed, anonymous adoptions of the past. You can take comfort in knowing that your son and his girlfriend can choose to get updates from the adoptive family as the child grows, and can even arrange to stay in contact with the child through letters, phone calls or visits.

Because adoption today doesn’t have to be a permanent goodbye, everyone involved can focus on what matters most: Ensuring that the child will grow up surrounded by love and safety.

Our Legacy counselors are happy to help you navigate the situation and embrace a supportive role when your son’s girlfriend is pregnant. Contact our Texas adoption agency or call us at (817) 784-7641 to speak with an adoption counselor today.